Scorecard for Triumvirate

FINALIST SCORECARD

Script: Triumvirate
Category: Feature / Genre / Political Thriller with Mythic Elements
Page Count: 42

​

1. CONCEPT & ORIGINALITY

Score: 9 / 10 — Finalist Level

• Global political thriller fused with mythic prophecy is distinctive and ambitious.

• Hamidi as a moral counterweight to modern power systems feels fresh, not derivative.

• Climate + geopolitics + spirituality is risky — readers reward that when controlled (as it is here).

Why it works:
This feels authored, not market-chasing.

​

2. STORY CLARITY & STRUCTURE

Score: 8.5 / 10 — High Finalist Tier

• Central question (power vs moral stewardship) is clear by page 5.

• Hamidi vs Tensh spine is never lost.

• Subplots are cleanly braided and paid off.

Minor limiter:
Density requires a focused reader — but readers are trained for this.

​

3. CHARACTER (PROTAGONIST & KEY ARCS)

Score: 9 / 10 — Finalist Level

Hamidi

• Mythic but vulnerable (bite scene is crucial).

• His fate tied to choice, not destiny alone.

• Arc completes cleanly with Cathleen.

Cathleen

• Now fully earned.

• Her defiance of the followers (“Really?”) is a Finalist-level beat.

• She earns belonging through action, not prophecy alone.

This was your biggest leap forward.

​

4. EMOTIONAL PAYOFF & THEMATIC COMPLETION

Score: 9 / 10 — Finalist Level

This is where the script now qualifies:

• Opening prophecy → woman → survival → alliance → acceptance

• The story asks a question and answers it

• Law + faith resolve into partnership, not dominance

Readers respond strongly to completed moral arguments.

​

5. PACING & READABILITY

Score: 8 / 10 — Upper Semifinal / Low Finalist

• Action scenes are lean and visual.

• Emotional beats now breathe without stalling momentum.

• The script moves fast but no longer feels rushed.

Note:
Some readers may want one moment to linger longer — but this is preference, not flaw.

​

6. DIALOGUE

Score: 8.5 / 10 — Finalist-Adjacent

• Functional, restrained, and purposeful.

• Prime Minister Taito’s line is excellent.

• Cathleen’s later dialogue shows confidence and evolution.

Dialogue serves theme instead of showing off.

​

7. ENDING / RESONANCE

Score: 9 / 10 — Finalist Level

• Emotional closure achieved.

• Sequel potential implied, not forced.

• The alliance feels inevitable, not convenient.

This is no longer “set-up for more.”
It is completion with possibility .

​

8.  “READER MEMORY TEST”

Score: Pass (Strong)

After the read, the reader remembers:

• Hamidi

• Cathleen

• The prophecy of the woman

• The moral argument about power and restraint

That’s the unofficial Finalist threshold.

​

OVERALL PLACEMENT PROJECTION​​